As Big As The Sky
When my brother and I were young, our mother would say that she loved us ‘bunches and bunches, as big as the sky.’ This phrase stayed with me throughout my life, but it wasn’t until she passed away that I truly understood its significance. Just before undergoing surgery caused by her declining health, my mother gave me a camera that she had carried with her since she was young. Despite our closeness, I never knew about this part of her life. As it turned out, her passing unveiled hidden chapters of her life, and in her image archive, I discovered a bridge between our worlds. With her camera in hand, I began navigating a stream of consciousness around the places, people, and emotions I found myself surrounded by. Her camera became a tool for me to navigate my grief and reflect on the spiritual absence in my family following her death.
After her passing, there was a void that could not be filled by someone who embodied the spirit of my family. However, encountering her photographic archive opened a new dimension of connection between us. It was as if I had stumbled upon her inner thoughts and perspectives—a visual diary offering glimpses into her life before her role as a mother. I began to understand her not just as my mother, but as Phyllis Granger, an individual with her own dreams, experiences, and joys. This journey has not only been a way to honor her memory but has also served as a bridge between our shared passion, allowing me to feel her influence and presence every time I use her camera.
